Passion is my weakness

This is a post that I made in my other blog and decided to transfer everything here. Enoy! or not. It's all the same with me.




Saturday, August 23, 2008

Passion is my weakness... pt 1
Current mood: pleased
Category: Romance and Relationships

I had the BEST day yesterday!!!

So I was hoping to hang out with a friend, and I was all stoked, and then he said he couldn't, and I was totally bummed out, so I was like FUCK IT IMMA GET A BEER! So I went to the pub and got a beer, and got hit on by a really ugly guy, lol.

I was just gonna sit there and pout, but while I was there I was all like… why pout! Have fun! So I called a dif friend and told him he should meet me there. So about half an hour later he shows up, we drink way too much beer, and I tell him something that's been on my mind for while… I wanna see him naked. Okay, so this guy is JUST a friend, but I've always thought he was hot!!! And lately we've been hanging out more, and he is just SO sexy! So after 3 shared pitchers, I told him, lol. Oh! And he has a gf… another reason why we have only been friends, well that and cuz I thought he wasn't interested…

So we keep drinking, and he brings up a conversation we had a couple weeks ago, about how I was kinda looking for a FWB and he was intrigued. So OMG!!! I'm not gonna say details, cuz some of you know him, but HE PROPOSITIONED ME!!! FOR SEX!!! AAAAAAAAHH! The bad thing is, I am so tempted!

So now I am stuck in the dilemma whether or not to do it. I mean, if I were a guy, would this even be a discussion??? I'd just fuck the person… you know? I am just irritated, I guess, cuz for me, I would see it as a conquest… I mean, this really hot guy wants to fuck me… why wouldn't I? Again look at it from the opposite side : If it were a guy being propositioned by a hot chick he would lay her down right there! Even if she had a bf! People might think he's a bit of a db for having sex w/ a chick in a relationship, but even then, it would be "Oh it was her choice" or "hell yeah! You fucked ___" why is it ANY different cuz I'm a girl??? Why do I get judged harsher? Grrrr

Anyway, I am just saying it was fuckin awesome to be propositioned by this guy I've been lusting after for awhile.




Saturday, August 30, 2008

Passion is my weakness… Pt 2 (warning this is WAY TMI, don‘t read if pt 1 bothered you…)


Last night he came over. We had a few drinks like normal. This is after he propositioned me last weekend… read pt 1 if you haven't yet, and come back to this.

Anyway, neither of us had said anything about it since last weekend. I hardly even saw him at work, just chatted a little on im. So yesterday I asked him if he wanted to have a few drinks after work, and he said sure. He came over after he got off and we had a couple drinks, watched a movie, and then, lol, started texting each other, LMAO!! How high school, right? Except, we didn't send them, we just passed the phone back and forth, I'm laughing at myself just thinking about it.

So he asked me if I even wanted to finish the movie, and I said that really found him attractive, blah blah blah, but wasn't really wanting to go all that far, maybe just making out… was so proud of myself. I told him up front that I didn't want to have sex. YAY ME!

We ended up taking the movie back to my room and finishing it there, watched a little youtube, lol neither of us made a move. Well I certainly wasn't going to!!! I ended up putting my laptop on my headboard and we laid there and talked for a min, then BAM! He was leaning over me… Hehehe, lol! Sorry, brains running away with me. Damn it! Okay, so he was leaning over me, and I am like FUCK this guy is sexy!!!!

He has a fantastic smile! Piercing eyes! Messy sexy hair! Nice pecs! Rockin body! Not super muscular, but he certainly has enough. But it's mostly the mouth… mmm. Okay, so he is leaning over me, one arm on each side of me, face above mine, his longish hair falling down into his face, and he's like "Hi" lol!!! So of course I HAVE to reach up and run my fingers through his hair, duh! And he leans down and we start to kiss.

Oh man! He has really nice lips! They are soft, and the way he moves them, in conjunction with his tongue… damn! Okay, so, yeah, he is a fantastic kisser! The way his mouth is moving with mine is amazing.

As we kiss we both kinda lose an article of clothing or two, and SWEEEEET! I get to see him without his shirt on, which is something I have been dreaming about for HOW long??? His chest is sexy, his shoulders are corded, his arms are bulgy, lol, probably bad descriptives, but I am just laying there, drinking in the sexiness that is he. I couldn't help but just stare, and as I was staring I couldn't help running my hands all over him. Hmmm… sorry, getting caught up thinking about it again. Where was I?

Well that was pretty much is actually. I guess all in all it was a pretty average make out session. Neither of us lost our bottoms, neither of us touched below the waist. It was just so amazing though!!! The sparks! The passion. During this whole thing I could hardly think! And that's how it should be! You should just totally lose yourself! Just be caught up in the feelings, the touching, the sensuality of two people enjoying each other.

I didn't let myself completely go, I couldn't. Then I woulda done what promised myself I wouldn't do. It was so hard though… letting my brain in, just enough to realize I was approaching the point of no return. But this situation just helps me realize what I need. What I deserve. Passion! I will never settle for less.